India's Mystery

The heat.

Imagine my surprise upon stepping off the plane only 14 hours later to discover that INDIA was experiencing its highest heat wave in over 70 years…………the newspapers and TV sets were reporting that the power outages caused by the average 120-130 degree heat waves caused numerous power outages, dying people from thirst and business shutdowns from power outages. http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/2933252.stm

My so-called 4 star hotel experienced constant power outages and so my first day of Delhi was met by candlelight, small crevices to which I had to squeeze into showers and rooms in the dark, and the realization that I was about to see and experience an entirely new way of living……….But first I had to nurse my legs as the blood clots from the flight and the drastic temperature change made my legs go numb for the first few days…

The best way I can describe my experience was that it was like getting stung: at first I was hurting by what I was seeing, a constant itch that felt as if I would literally split open and die, and slowly as time went on, I began to tingle and the sensations and emotions I was experiencing was nothing short of an orgasm. I have become infected indeed, and never shall I remain the same person I was before arriving in INDIA.

You are not given a lot of time to think about any one particular sensation as INDIA is constantly moving……..the traffic holds no rules and its roads are full of rickshaws, motorbikes, outdated cars, cows (my driver told me the cows roam free at night from their owners and return home by morning!) camels, donkeys, goats, children, and brightly colored people. The sounds of horns and activity are everywhere. Families would share a single motorbike as their main form of transportation and it is not unusual to see a mother hanging her legs from the side of the bike with a newborn in her arms and a small child riding with the father in front near the handlebars, sans helmet of course. The various smells intermingle together: urine, sweat, spices, exhaust fumes, and various market foods. The hustle and bustle of the city gives new meaning to the term, "The City That Never Sleeps…" This is a country in which constantly activity and motion is never at leisure.

All eyes were staring at me. This is a country in which mostly men roam the streets: at markets, in stores, in restaurants, at the hotel. I was constantly asking myself the question, "Where are the women?" If I did spot one, she was covered up from head to toe, sometimes only her eyes would show beneath her head scarf. The women wore the most beautifully colored saris and gold jewelry that I am hard pressed to ever feel beautiful again wearing black. Even if your surroundings around you are in despair, your soul can still shine in colors around you.

This is a country of many strays………I have never had my heart strings pulled upon as often as I did during this trip. In every city I visited, there are rows and rows of people lying on the streets on cardboard make shift beds, shoes missing, bathing forgotten and children left in various corners or metro stations while their parents beg and look for food or water. At one point, I spotted a baby under the age of one who I recognized earlier from the metro area with his begging mother who later that day, was sitting propped up in the hot Delhi sun, alone and crying without anyone stopping by or taking note of the baby. I finally lost it then, picking up this baby and drawing attention from the crowd in hopes of someone notifying its mother. It took twenty minutes for the crowd to locate his mother, as she was down the street begging in a different location while her baby sat away in a different location. I gave her the equivalent of $50 and you'd think I had sent her to heaven!, the joy that overcame her. From that day forward, I decided to donate my money every night to buying families' food and water. You could easily supply an entire family food and water for less than $5 per family. There were families I adopted in Jaipur, the city I ended up remaining in for the last ten days of my stay, and I can say that I miss some of those families and children immensely since I left.

My mind has not been able to erase the countless images of children sifting through the dumpsters or trash piles for any bit of food available next to starving dogs, cows, goats and birds. To see a child's face begging at your car is indescribable……

These were the first stings………once you go through your "Initiation period", INDIA rewards you with her hidden lure. You do not realize at first what is happening to you. You are changed in an instant, transformed to a different world, a different measuring standard, and once you go deep within your soul, you are now fully alive to experience the rest.

And here is what I managed to see and do:

My first train ride in INDIA was unlike any other…..attempting to sift through a train station in INDIA with thousands of waiting families is an experience itself. Always the heat is trailing you, reminding you that its there. Faces were always staring at me. I attempted to blend in with my custom bought Punjabi dresses, but the color of my skin was enough to give me away. I gave away sticks of gum to curious children who encircled me, always staring or desiring to touch me to see if I was real or not. In broken English they would ask, "Where are you from?" Imagine the dilated pupils at my reply: "New York." People were inspecting my every move. I cannot forget feeling as if I was witnessing all of India's vulnerabilities and through looks or glances, my attempt to convey, "It's alright…" It's alright that I am seeing you raw and naked. Your lives are safe with me. You realize how lucky you have been all of your life simply for being born where you have.

The idea of starting a nonprofit in the USA where we pay for inner city American teenagers to go to INDIA to assist the poor has crossed my mind. I cannot imagine how life-changing it truly would be once Americans who get over the "poor me" phase of acting out would be altered if we provided "another version" of true poverty and ghetto living to others than the ones depicted in many American rap videos or movies. Let's send Snoop Doggie Dog and Ice-T to Bombay and now that's a movie I'd pay to go see!

My American friend Dave and I made it to AGRA to see the Taj Mahal. AGRA has a reputation of pushing its foreigners in hired AC cars or rickshaws and pushing you to go shopping in its stores. With the heat, it was a quick tour of the TAJ that day. There are not many covering trees and so the feeling of being constantly wet with perspiration was always felt. The TAJ was certainly beautiful to look at but I'd prefer to take a moonlit private tour which I learned about later during my trip. I imagine seeing such a romantic testament of love is worthwhile indeed.
Our train ride from Agra to Jaipur was less luxurious in style or comfort but gave us an idea of how most Indians travel on the train. There was constant chatter, music and babies crying. Families passed around home prepared meals to one another while passengers got up frequently to chat with other people on the train. One family donated a dinner to my friend and I. Eating was sheer pleasure in INDIA. I ate mostly vegetarian the entire time and adored the various colors, textures, spices and smells of its varied cuisine. I am determined to learn vegetarian cooking so that I may eventually quit meat altogether. My favorites were pouri bread, Rajastani style chole, veggie "lollipops" and Indian chai tea. I thought I would lose weight in INDIA but I fear I'll need a week to burn off any extra pounds for simply indulging so often in various breads, rice dishes and saucy delights!

You get a wonderful view of village living from a train ride. I noticed a large number of people squatting in fields to go to the bathroom which was new to me. I saw colorful villages, beautiful huts or buildings, women pumping water from wells, boys on rooftops, men selling newspapers, Hindu shrines or temples, various trees or birds, farmers and lots of animals.

By the time I reached the "Pink City" of JAIPUR, I knew I wanted to simply rest awhile. I was tired of the constant moving around in such heat and was so impressed by the beauty of comfort of our Jaipur hotel, (www.madhuban.net) that I stayed the remaining 10 days there. The hotel was a kickback to the British Raj period and the owner was very hospitable and warm with his treatment of a visitor. I felt as if I was home there. My hired driver, Sher (pronounced like our singer Cher) was very knowledgeable regarding where we should go or what we should see daily.

Highlights included the magnificent Amer Palace and Fort ( http://www.rajasthan-tourism.org/prime-attractions/amer-palace.html  ) the Old City Markets of Jaipur, the fascinating and fun Monkey Temple ( http://www.travelblog.org/Asia/India/Jaipur/blog-51180.html ) the factories to which I custom designed my own line of fashion dresses, the Kerala Center of Aruvedic Massage and Medicine (I was analyzed for free and had a massage by a girl who looked around 12 years old for only $10 an hour!)  I went to a Bollywood movie at the most famous ASIAN movie theater, The Raj Mandhir, coincidentally located in Jaipur; I took a free Indian cooking class at a notable 5 star restaurant in Jaipur with a chef who coincidentally owns 5 star restaurants in both New York City and San Diego. I witnessed about 50 different Indian-style weddings during my stay as this is the season for weddings in INDIA. Most weddings take place outside at night with brightly costumed horses and elephants carry the groom to the bride's home with a colorful marching band and people holding up these long, green glow light torches that reminded me of the swords of STAR WARS, thus reminding me of that movie. Women danced in their best sari's in the center of every wedding party. I bought art work, fabrics and clothing from the traditional Rajasthan stores. I had a tour of a carpet factory. I visited an Indian "Smoking Lounge" in a mall, a white lounge like room similar in style to New York City's oxygen bars. I got my skin analyzed for free by a dermatologist there and realized that most medical procedures are cheaper by 75%. I tasted many new fruits and vegetables unheard of in the US. I have henna tattoos drawn onto my hands and feet for a total of $6! I bought a beautiful pearl ring from Jaipur's legendary GEM PALACE for only $30! (sold in the US, it would be worth $200) I drank my first "Lassi Walla" drink in Jaipur. I had a private tour of the Rambagh Palace, a Taj hotel.  I attended an ethnic village "theme park" called Chokra Dhan where traditional puppet shows, cobra handlers, peacocks,  music and fire dancers were featured as well as the best meal I experienced in INDIA being served Punjabi style on floor mats with men adding various dishes and breads on your plate. Never mind that the power went out during the meal leaving us in the dark. The music kept playing and I felt alive that night……

At one point, I was a little homesick for only one thing: American coffee concoctions. I was able to find a Barista Coffee Place near the mall and fear I may have my driver addicted to our Choco Frappes we shared daily every morning. It was coincidentally also the same location where a decent bathroom could be found and I felt victorious in planning my day around a needed bathroom break. I got to know the people at the "Luxury Mall…" I felt a tad like Paris Hilton might when you walk in treated like royalty for simply having a private car and driver, choco frappe in hand and a desire to buy affordable leather sandals and Indian music. I made friends with Indian girls who worked at the mall's only cosmetics store. I had run out of sunless tanning cream and found it interesting on how most Indian women buy "whitening lotions" to make themselves appear whiter while western women have a desire to be tanner! When it came time for me to try on some shoes, I noticed an entire pound of shit was on my shoes, a popular technique in which shoe shiners will throw at your feet in an attempt to get you to pay for them to clean them. That pair quickly reached a garbage can and I bought 5 pairs of genuine leather sandals for around $20! The price was always made up with the frustration of trying to locate decent camera batteries as mine ran out and I discovered that most Indian batteries sold to you are expired or lose potency from that desert heat. I spent an average $10 a day to take 3-4 shots per pack…

I will never warm up to the India method of shopping. You must haggle constantly with shopkeepers who do attempt to charge you more for EVERYTHING for simply the color of your skin. At first it is charming to have shop owners drag you into their stores, treat you to a chai on their sofas while they throw various saris or fabrics in front of you with the help of their children or hired help. But we, Americans, are used to quick browsing and knowing the price up front and I found myself exhausted by the mere process of getting anything in INDIA. Many times I'd return back to the car exhausted and hot, with shopkeepers finally agreeing to my originally bargained lowered price, albeit the difference of only dollars but never feeling as though my "prize" or items bought were really worth the effort. It was simply too hot out to be bargaining just so….

Eventually my days in Jaipur took form. I'd wake by 7am, head to the markets or sightseeing until noon with my driver, stop for a coffee and return to the hotel to sleep all afternoon. My driver Sher and I started our nap ritual with a Mango-flavored ice pop to cool off. The sandstorms would occur in afternoon, sometimes rattling the hotel windows while knocking out power temporarily. I felt at most peace sleeping barefoot with the fan running over my face. I'd waken around 5pm with a quick shower, and head out at dinnertime for a few more hours of dinner, car touring and delivering meals for needed children or families on the streets.

I had a hard time sleeping at night in INDIA. I'd finally have the time to rest with those images in my head, playing back the reels of imagery from that day. I'd find myself breaking down in tears for some time, feeling guilty inside for the life I have been living without realizing how others in this world are living. I started reading books again and fell in love with my now-all time new favorite #1 book, "The Kite Runner" by Khaled Hussein, a story of two Afghanistan boys growing up in Kabul. I started the Da Vinci Code and am addicted. Some times I'd turn on the Indian television and watch the 50 or so various channels and languages, trying to understand an Indian soap opera, a Bollywood movie, an American crime show (Indians LOVE our American style journalism, crime shows, business roundtable shows, The Apprentice and Baywatch!) music videos from around the world, Indian Idol, or various religious swami's or guru's who had their own following. The biggest news story in INDIA besides the heat or the riots of Indian doctors against the government was the story of a village grade teacher, a man, and why he was teaching primary students while carrying a gun! They interviewed the various children and no one from the school was able to disarm this man! In certain more remote areas of India, a desire to shut down women's beauty salons is happening as many men there fear "illicit activities" occur when large groups of women gather. The women depicted in movies or TV shows looked nothing like the women I saw during my travels in INDIA. I was surprised at how sexually dressed or acting the Indian actresses appeared in TV shows, music videos or movies. It was as if a fantasy world existed on TV for men.

Another interesting observation was how many Indian men hold hands in the streets. The young and the old, age or class unimportant, but men feel comfortable being this close to a man, whereas the same behavior displayed between a man and a woman in public would be considered provocative….I read many disturbing newspaper articles of women in remote villages of INDIA being gang raped, aborted by parents who could tell the sex of their baby before it was born, or the high percentage of female students who committed suicide before the age of 15. INDIA is in denial about her stance on the sacred female.

I did find it hopeful that some of INDIA's youth sneak away together in restaurants or bars to attempt to live freely in relationships though…..

I cannot describe in justice the multiple sights, sensations, smells, and feelings INDIA provokes from within. Your consciousness is pried open and your ability to feel everything is apparent. This experience is a true testament to the strength and courage of the human spirit—